Violet Markey lives for the future, counting the days until graduation, when she can escape her Indiana town and her aching grief in the wake of her sister’s recent death.When Finch and Violet meet on the ledge of the bell tower at school, it’s unclear who saves whom. And when they pair up on a project to discover the “natural wonders” of their state, both Finch and Violet make more important discoveries: It’s only with Violet that Finch can be himself—a weird, funny, live-out-loud guy who’s not such a freak after all. And it’s only with Finch that Violet can forget to count away the days and start living them. But as Violet’s world grows, Finch’s begins to shrink.
This isn't my "kind of book." I usually steer clear of tough subjects, issue books, etc. I'm thrilled books about drug usage, terminal diseases, grief, or mental illness are out there and we're seeing a broader spectrum of humans represented - now more than ever. But if I'm being totally honest as a reader, I'm not usually the best audience for such books. I'm a naturally empathetic person - more than I want to be sometimes and I feel great pain for people in pain. So well written books that portray the devastation of loss, of sickness, of darkness usually just cut me deeper than I feel I need to be cut - considering how much I read. Still some of these books end up being the ones that stick with me, even if they aren't always my favorite, because they usually leave a lasting impression on my emotional state. Books that explore tough topics are usually the ones that are immediately altering - 13 REASONS WHY by Jay Asher, FAULT IN OUR STARS by John Green, and IF I STAY by Gayle Forman to name a few. I wind up deeply affected by these characters and they all set the world sliding a few notches into a new lens. So why don't I pick them up more often? Because it's a huge gamble - if they're poorly written, or if I can't quite relate then it's hugely disappointing. And it doesn't seem to quite honor the hugeness behind the reason that story is out there. If it doesn't have the big emotion behind it, how are we supposed to get inside the minds of those who aren't like us? It's more likely I'll pick up a tough book without emotion and it will just be bleak. And I guess, even the ones with the big emotion behind it - they're epic and changing and in the right hands they're life-saving - but a girl can only handle so much pain, loss, struggle and BIG LOVE, even in a fictional sense every once in a while.
I've begun this post with a tangent, I apologize. I'm leaving it anyway because I feel it needs to be said. I think you should know where I'm coming from when I say - read. this. book. I don't pick up books that begin with potential suicide. But a combination of hearing good things from other readers, a remarkable cover, and that inexplicable, magical energy drawing me to read this book right away had me hanging out with the sparks of humanity that are Theodore Finch and Violet Markey. These two have such charisma that even in their darkest moments, they draw in the reader to want to know them, to want to be next to them, to want to love them enough. The balance between these two is so fragile and it didn't take much for my heart to be completely in love with both of them. Which led to this strange feeling of soaring and sinking simultaneously as the book goes on. Where Violet goes, I go. Where Finch goes, I go. And both journeys have their own highs and lows.
There's a great surface story - the saving grace of kindred souls, the unexpected love story, the mania of depression, the loss of a sister and best friend, the commentary of the anticipation of graduation. But I want to talk about the things happening underneath. As Violet says, "It's not what we take with us, but what we leave behind." Violet and Finch grow closer as they're tasked with wandering. For a high school project they have to see the sights of Indiana - which seems like a funny task, but they take it and make it into a no-wonder-too-small situation (which I adore). They begin with the highest point in the state - a hill - and then a home-built roller coaster. Finch is very adamant about leaving something behind - to say you were there. And in a book that is so pre-occupied with death and with loss, it's a poignant act. This simple act of just leaving a piece of themselves behind, makes their characters more permanent...and just...more. And then it goes beyond things to say - it's the people we leave behind that are a true mark of who we are.
And usually this is a morbid thing. Leaving people behind. But this might be the first time I've drawn a conclusion that doesn't see that as negative. Because we influence people - and this even draws back to 13 REASONS WHY in a really great way - whether we mean to or not. And those people we have the biggest influence on - well they are our landmarks. They are the - yeah, I'm going there - bright places in the universes we create for ourselves. The need to leave a mark to say I was here is underlined in this beautiful story - and I've come out with it to say that we all leave that I was here across the lives we touch. Our greatest achievements, our best moments, our immortal and spectacular selves are stored in each other. And this revelation is channeled through Violet and Finch in a way that elevates these characters and makes them beings that will forever be a part of who I am.
